I normally try to do this post right around new year, but I didn’t. I’m not sure if I was still trying to process everything that happened last year or if I was too busy trying to move on into 2023. Either way, here it is: my reflections on a roller coaster, gut wrenching year with many emotional highs and lows. This year brought me closer to some dreams and shattered others.
Roses
I accomplished many goals that I set for myself in 2022 and demonstrated that hard work (with a dose of spontaneity and flexibility) pays off:
- I graduated with my masters degree! This was one of the goals I set for myself in 2022.
- I got a paper accepted into one of the best robotics conferences: IEEE/RSJ International Conference on Intelligent Robots and Systems (IROS). All told, I completed grad school with 4 publications (2 first authors), 2 patent applications, and 1 conference talk. Not bad for 18 months work!
- I joined a robotics startup. I have dreamed of being part of a startup since 2013 and I am extremely excited to be able to take this leap and join an amazing new team.
- I travelled the country along the entirety of Route 66.
- I visited 11 national parks (Joshua Tree, Death Valley, Kings Canyon, Sequoyah, Yosemite, Pinnacles, Badlands, Wind Caves, Petrified Forest, Crater Lake, and Gateway Arch).
- I had a solid set of friends who supported me when I needed it and I am really grateful.
Thorns
I never enjoy making snap decisions under pressure, and I made some bad ones this year. My values were challenged and my ego bruised. I’m still not sure what the lasting impact of these events will be:
- My romantic life imploded and it hurt. I lurched forward too soon, I sent shrapnel everywhere, and had to pick up the pieces.
- Family drama from 2012 resurfaced and it really hurt, too. Despite emotional manipulation and threats of physical violence, I reinforced my boundaries and decided to move forward by living the life I wanted to live.
- A cousin committed suicide. This came as a real shock and hit me doubly hard given the other family drama.
- My savings evaporated between a stock market slump and expenditures to transition out of grad school. The economic turmoil added to my stress and I felt pressure to make decisions quickly.
- I was rear ended in my first car crash, though all parties walked away without physical injuries.
- Throughout this roller coaster, I felt burnt out and used. Instead of leaning on friends for support, I disconnected and retreated into my shell.
- The loneliness from crumbling {romantic, friendly, and family} relationships sunk in deeply after moving 100’s of miles away from where I’ve lived for the past 20+ years.
Buds
Despite the turmoil, I made it through the year and am now focused on recharging, repairing, and rebuilding. This year (2023) is a new chapter with new beginnings.
- I look forward to focusing on myself and finding ways to improve my emotional health and physical fitness. Let’s see if I can keep my momentum going at the rock climbing gym!
- After finishing grad school and transitioning into a new field as a software engineer, I am excited about more professional development and career growth with a great new team.
- I overcorrected in establishing and setting my boundaries last year, and this year I want to focus on maintaining healthy relationships.
- I have plans to go backpacking with some friends in the Sierra Nevada Mountains later this year. Going on a big backpacking trip was one of the goals I missed last year, and I’m glad I have a crew ready to go this year.
- Assuming no major upsets, I am on track to finally be debt free by the end of this year!
- This is a year I will likely spend living in the moment while I set new goals for the next decade of my life. I can’t wait to see where that will take me.
So, here it is: my future! The journey down the rabbit hole continues.
